Hello, my beautiful community!
I hope we’ve all enjoyed a lovely weekend with friends or family. I enjoyed the midtown district, known as Crosstown in my city, where I grabbed a delicious hibiscus tea and plantain soup on the rooftop. During this time, I released all my stress from the work week and thoroughly admired my presence on Earth. While listening to the birds chirp and the songs of the trees, I began to release all tension in my body, allowing myself to feel the breeze through my hair and the sun’s rays kissing my skin, stepping away from life’s busyness to admire nature’s everyday beauty.
We deserve to live life to the fullest and not constantly wonder when the next goal will be achieved, whether our post got enough views, or whether we have more followers on our social media apps. I’m not saying goal setting is wrong; however, binging on the emotions of success or your definition of “I’ve made it” is not healthy as a constant motivator or mindset. Today, we will focus on the simple ability to quiet our minds, achieve our goals by speaking to God in a beautiful conversation rather than constant demands, and praise him for the blessings of our future.
Release the urge to binge!
When you think of the word binge, what comes to mind? It has multiple definitions; it could relate to losing control around food, obsessive goal setting, or watching your favorite television series or podcast on a constant loop until everything sounds like muffled elevator music.
Allowing your body and mind to unwind and refocus, officially switching to home mode, is a healthy work-life balance. However, switching off the busyness of life in one’s brain doesn’t mean numbly enjoying our favorite shows, music, or food. Instead, adopt a wise mindset that is familiar with grace and purpose. As we pace ourselves steadily towards our goals, rewards and milestones achieved have more significant effects! For me, whenever I finished binging, I felt nothing but guilt, less self-value, and love, and I always said, “I’m never doing this again.” Then, three weeks later, I would perform the same negative behavior. Don’t be like me, forcefully placing yourself in an unattainable toxic relationship with goal setting and chasing in your life, then be defeated when it is not fully achieved or when the temporary dopamine effect has gone away.
As I mentioned last week, there is beauty in humbleness and revision. We are constantly evolving; no one’s story is finished, so why not enjoy the everyday miracles and beautiful detours in life along the path to your destiny? This weekend allowed me to step away from the busy hustle of my goals, slow down, and genuinely enjoy the brushstrokes of life. It is true what they say, “Life is what you make it, so let’s make it rock.” Stop the over-comparisons, the false narratives, the adverse self-love, and the timelines. Live now by genuinely investing in your talents, abilities, and future self so you won’t be regretful ten years from now. You are the conductor of your orchestra; no one else can be that driving force but you.
Make way for improvements.
I’ve recently been listening to this audiobook called Becoming Your Future Self Now by Dr. Benjamin Hardy. Gosh, does it have some golden nuggets in it?! One of the key takeaways I took from it yesterday was that if you don’t have three goals you are at least hoping to achieve, then you are currently without goals. It didn’t make much sense when I first heard that sentence because sometimes you can’t find 5 or 7 goals to achieve every quarter. But then I took myself out of the obsessive goal mindset and realized he was right!
He mentioned how we should start smaller and then grow those goals to a larger scale to achieve the bigger picture, not by overwhelming ourselves with five mini steps of reaching our first ultimate goal of the year. Since I am a corporate cutie, I am always goal-setting, typically writing 3-5 every quarter, so this notion wasn’t unfamiliar. I began this year with a different mindset that I wouldn’t push myself too hard in networking, interest meetings, or volunteering, as in previous years. As I realigned my goals, I focused on the incredible attributes I contribute as a determined, strong-willed woman currently and the next steps I wanted to take to achieve my goals and make myself a stronger candidate. So, not only did I create five goals of more substance for work, but I also created roughly five goals personally to achieve this year, or those that still needed to be completed last year.
As the author said, “Do not overwhelm yourself with the process to get there.” Sure, on paper, saying, “I have five goals this year,” sounds impressive, but it also is stressful and unattainable for some. This is why he recommended a sturdy number of 3. My top five personal goals were to create a public Pinterest account to start posting fashion, build a website for blogging, save “x” amount of dollars, allow myself to experience healthy dating, and get certified as a Pilates instructor! Of course, there are other goals I am out to achieve. However, those were the top 5 that I wanted to focus on that were more attainable in this post—applying what Benjamin Hardy mentioned regarding setting healthier goals. I canceled the lesser goals of value and began focusing on more significant achievements of substance, which would be investing in the dream bigger as a whole. I am happy to announce that three of the five are in progress thanks to adopting this new mindset of healthier goal setting, and a fourth goal will be achieved later this year!
Harness you power
So, babes, as we conclude. Please take a beat if you need help with the process. Life is too short to obsess over which goals we have failed at and place blame on certain factors as to why our timelines are not similar to those of our best friend, Brittney. Realign and refocus yourself. Have conversations internally, with your family, and, if you’re spiritual, with God by being honest with yourself and him. Dreams don’t work without a mission, determination, or the ability to admit when you are wrong or recover from humility. Always remain steadfast, determined, gracious, and humble.